3 things my child has taught me!

You don't become parents, you are made parents by your kids. This transformation from ordinary people to parents is not complete until and unless you can understand their needs and wants even before they learn to communicate them to you in some sort of a language.

With this in mind, here are the top 3 things that I have learnt from my kids.

1) Love: No matter how much you think you are in love with someone, be it your spouse, your parents, your siblings or even cupid's own college sweetheart, you haven't understood love until and unless your child first smiles at you around 2 months of age. His toothless grin, with those twinkling eyes will set apart a place in your heart so special, that even your own other children after your first born can't occupy!

2) Time: Your child will grow fast and the faster he grows the slower you will wish he does. You will crave to spend more time with the gurgles and giggles but before you know it, he would have gone from crawling to falling to walking to asking for the car keys. This was said best in the song 'Cats in the Cradle'. Spend each free minute with your child, watch him learn things, watch him grow, watch him imitate you to learn how to express himself. It beats the feeling of any bonus you will get at work, any lottery you win, any other joy you will ever know.

3) Patience: Your child will go on and on about the things he wants, will not be willing to wait 10 seconds for it, will thump his fists and stomp his feet till he gets it, and when he does he will smile at you like he has never smiled before. This is a huge challenge to discipline him but it is also a huge learning experience. The less patience he has, the more you will need to keep in order to stop yourself from screaming at him or whacking him both of which prove futile. Be patient, be calm and like all other characteristics, he will pick these up from you as well and be a more patient person when he grows.

There are so many more things that kids teach you, but personally for me, these are on top of my list!

*Yes this is my family, my beautiful wife Vinita, my star son Toofan and my darling daughter Bijlee!

If I had 2 extra hours in a day, what would I do?

2 hours, 120 minutes, 7200 seconds, 432000 milliseconds, I could go on but this would then just be a math's lesson. The point is 2 hours can be an incredibly long period of time or it can be very very short, depends completely on what you intend to do with it.

For most people living in my city, Bombay / Mumbai, it is a luxury we all can ill afford, but look forward to with every holiday we get from work, every vacation we plan, every break, every Sunday of every week.

Realistically, though, the first reaction to getting 2 extra hours would be something like this. "Wow! I've got 2 hours free....what should I do?? And before you know it the time has flown by!

I've always been a bit of a dreamer and I think the best use of free time is to give free reign to your imagination, spend some quality time with yourself. Our life is too much hustle bustle, hurry worry and curry, all work and no play, what would he/she think etc etc. How many of us take time off to just sit and think and dream!

 

Imagine yourself enjoying the holiday you always wanted to go to but didn't get the chance. Paint a picture like Picasso / Monet. Be the smiling Madonna. Build that tall tower of dreams like the Burj Khalifa! Innovate like Steve Jobs (may his soul RIP). You will feel the most relaxed you have in years! Sure, you've just wiled away your two hours, but you end up with a smile on your face and no time is worth more than that.

 If you're a newly made parent like me, there is no question about it! Take each and every one of those 432000 milliseconds and spend it with your child! Sit with him/her, talk to him/her, play with them and play like a child not an adult, put them to sleep, do whatever you can with them. Notice with an amazement unmatched by any other, how your mind suddenly clears up, your shoulders relax, you feel like you have no stress for once in your life. All that is there, is a silly smile on your face brought on by what can only be defined as the most innocent and heartfelt smile by your baby!

All this needs is some time. No toys, no food, no chocolate, not even mastercard! Being with you and enjoying every precious moment is all that it takes.

(This post was written for the Surf Excel Matic #GetSmart Contest on Indiblogger. Read more about Surf Excel Matic Here)

Hand Me Your Keys!

These posts are coming too few too late, but what to do. I am growing up too fast to keep pace with writing and daddy has no time to write for me as he says I am a big boy now and should write for myself.

I've started playschool and am loving it. I get to run around the class, make as much noise as I want, pull other people's hair and paint and scribble (all of which I am not allowed to do at home). I've also started learning a lot of things. For one, I know what keys are now and demand them every time I see some.

 I had gone visiting with my Daadi to her patient's room and my Mummy and Daddy came to pick me up. Since they both are now getting old and forgetful, they realised that they didn't have the house key, so we took Daadi's.

On the way back, I waaaaahed and baaaaahed till my daddy gave me the key to hold while he was holding me in his arms. Now being a child helps me get away with a lot. I swear I did not do this...but....the Keys fell into a drain on the road! It was around 8 and we were just outside our building. Curry time for me and worry time for the parents.

As luck would have it, there was no water in the drain at the time. Mommy's phone has a fantastic torch light so we could even see the key. For about 5 minutes, we just stood there saying bad bad words and wondering what to do. We had a fishing line and hook at home to lift clothes that fall off the clothes line but that was in our locked house! One super intelligent passer by in a car suggested we lift the drain cover. He kind of failed to notice that there was a parked car tyre over half of it! Not that we could open it anyway if there wasn't, as these are cemented into place!

Luckily, the kind uncle from Jain Stores who lives in our building, came across. He too had a fishing line in his house. He was so sweet that he ran up and got that down his fish hook. Daddy did some deft maneuvering and minutes later ta-da we had the keys in our hands (well in their hands) I haven't got my tiny fingers on house keys after this!

Mum Mum Mum Mum Mum

Mum Mum Mum Mum Mum - In the immortal words of 'me' - give me water, I'm dying of thirst.

I've learnt to say a lot more than this. Soon, I'll be making sense to all of you and I won't need to type everything I want to say. The first thing on my list would be to make Papa realise that he needs to keep this blog more up to date and post more often!


Hmmm, let's see what else have I learnt to say....

Few months ago, I started saying Paapaapaapaapaapaa and that got me a lot of attention, but I've stopped doing that now. I now go daadaadaadaadaa. Everything has a purpose you see. Now my dada thinks I'm calling out to him all the time and he makes me do a lot of fun things. He takes me around the house, buys parrots and birds for me to play with (PETA don't worry, they're toy birds)

He also lets me listen to music all the time with him. I now know how to put the ipod on with the remote when it's lodged in the dock. I also know how to change the channel on the tv, but somehow, every time I do so, it goes to this white and black screen with a horrible noise!

I also now make chap chap chap sounds when I want to eat. Mommy feeds me everyday and I must say she is simply awesome! She takes all the tantrums I throw, and still manages to feed me till I'm nice and full. Of late, I've been going to sleep during lunchtime, while watching my favorite nursery rhymes.

The latest development in my life is the fact that I can now start walking with support and am even trying to walk without support. I even fell on my face the other day, The chin is black and blue but my spirit is not broken yet.

Oh, and I promise to make daddy write more and mommy run around more cause I love them to bits!!!

I'm a jetsetter!

Here ye Here ye....The crown prince of domestic airlines approaches. I have just returned from my next travel session, this time to Bhubaneshwar, Puri and Vishakhapatnam.

 

A whole bunch of kids can boast of traveling a lot before they're 1 but how many do you know who have completed 1 of the 4 dhams (Char Dham - 4 holy places to see before you die for all Hindus who want to go to heaven!) before their grandparent's have! Ha!

I also had the good fortune of traveling to Konark to visit the World Heritage Sun Temple. What a wonderful temple but what horrible heat from the sun. I was forced to become Salmanish!

Also, I did my first train journey (8 hours) which was pure fun! Mommy kept me company and kept me well fed, even changed me in the train on the side berth. 

Then, there was the wedding - My maasi got married. Super fun it was. I played with each and every thing I could get my grubby hands on, stole attention from the bride and groom whenever possible and basically basked in the glory that is my childhood. (I know I'm getting cocky, but since I'm 9 months now I can get away with it). I went to the beach, I went to the disco, I went for a costume party dressed as an eskimo, I went for the Mehendi dressed as Krishna, I went to the wedding dressed in a black suit and I slept like a king with a sea view room! I went to the groom's chacha's restaurant where I was treated like a king with special Khicadi being made for me....which everyone loved and ate! 

 

Ahh! If this is what life is, bring it on I say!

P.S. So what did I teach my dad from all this you ask (since that is the purpose of this blog) - I taught him how to stop being lazy and get back to blogging about his Poopla!

He's A Big Boy Now!

My Son is 6 months old. He's a big boy now! He can even sit on his own without support. I guess this is the first step towards actual independence, in a way.

Up until now, he was completely dependent on us, his mommy and myself. Now, he's doing things on his own. It is a matter of pride, no doubt, to see your little one achieve his milestones so well.

A lot of people close to me ask me how it feels. I'm not quite sure. Mommy is super happy and excited. I am too but its really more than happiness isn't it. I mean I'm happy for my friend's birthday too, but this is something else!

Techknowbaby now smiles at will....and he smiles a lot. We make sure of that. No matter how tired or upset I am, I will always have a smile on my face once I see him. He has a way of bringing it out in you. His dada calls it an infectious smile. I agree!

There are few more things he does that invoke completely new feelings. He eats with me. Not an easy task, ask any parent. He sits on his chair and coos away till I look at him.

When he's sleepy, he will wrap his tiny fingers around my thumb and hold on...waiting till his eyes close or he gets bored. He even smiles at me in his sleep! If he's asleep when I'm carrying him, he'll adjust his neck just so it fits snugly between my shoulder and neck.

He's taught me lots already...and there's so much more to go. But if you think happy is enough to describe this birthday feeling, it's falling way short of the emotion that I cannot put a label on.

Yaay!! I'm six months old!

Yaay! I'm 6! What a wonderful journey it has been...

I know I haven't written much in the past few months but can you imagine why?? Let me paint you a picture.

Think about the most exotic location you would want to go for a vacation. You're there!

Think about what you would like to do. My guess is Laze and do nothing but relax, eat, drink and chill. Done!

Now, if you had a choice, wouldn't you have someone to wait on you hand and foot. Granted!

Let's say that you're getting relaxed but need just that something more to take you over the line. A massage maybe! There you go.

Added bonus. Someone to bathe you and wrap you up so that you can snooooooooze.
Ahhhhhhh!

Now, eat your heart out! This has been my life so far.

I get up, play, get entertained, get fed, nap, get up, get massaged, eat, sleep, get up again, eat, get entertained, play, go down for a walk or outing, eat, get entertained, come back, get a wash, eat, get entertained, play, eat, get washed, wrapped, eat and sleep! I can pee and poop when I want and I don't even have to move.
Do you now understand why I haven't written!

P.S. Important Updates - My vaccination is done, I can now sit on my own, laugh at will, shake hands with people I like and cry when I don't like you.

Watch this space for more.

Mommy says I'm growing bigger.

I'm settling down into a routine now. I wake up usually around 6ish....I know, I'm an early bird...and I get my worm...oops sorry mommie milk! Then on, its usually sleep feed sleep feed and in between getting my backside cleaned for me by mummy or daddy.

Until yesterday, when I was being naughty and troubling mummy. She complained to daddy about me and daddy picked me up to calm me down.He briefly mentioned to mommy that I was gaining weight. That was it.
It was all Mommy needed to express what she thought she was imagining. She could feel the strain now on her arms of picking me up and carrying me around.

Hehehehe I didn't tell anyone. I knew all along that I was growing fast.

I let out another surprise at them the same evening. I laughed. Not the gas inflicted smile that I would be forced to give while passing wind. This was a naughty, mischievous laugh baring all my would be teeth!

They looked like such goofs after that staring at me waiting for me to do it again. I guess I'll keep them waiting for a while more.

Keep reading

When will they ever learn.

I'm two weeks old now and so are my parents. I've grownup quickly quickly. They're still growing slowly!
I've learnt so many new things, you know...I learnt how to blink, how to bat my eyelashes, how to make silly faces so that people would pick me up.

I learnt that I have to burp quickly after my meal or else Mummy or Daddy whack my back till I am so tired that I fall asleep.

I also learnt to make noises to express myself when I need a change or I need to be fed. Still, they haven't figured out which noise is for which. There are so many times when I am hungry and they are groping around my backside waiting for poop. Then, there are times when I'm sitting in a pool of my poop but all mommy wants to do is feed me! I tell you, these adults are slow learners.

The other thing I've learnt is to not mess with my Maalish Aunty. She comes every morning, plops me over her legs and massages my skin with some slimy, slippery fluid. I've heard Daddy calling it Oil or something. It smells. If I protest though, aunty pushes my muscles harder. She also believes that I am old enough to exercise and stretches my arms and legs to the limit.

After this, is the time I like best. Bath time. She puts me on her feet, soaps me, washes me, flips me over on her feet, does the same thing with my back and then dries me off. Then, its Powder time. I smell great after that! Then its sleepy time! But they all insist on playing with me once I'm done!!! When will they ever learn!

Weeks before becoming Dad

I am intruding on my son's space but this blog is the first amongst many things I intend to share with him.
There are countless books on parenting telling Mom's what they should do. Very few focusing on what the dad should do, or even feel.

Numerous books on what to expect, what Mom will be feeling, how to cope with those feelings, how its normal to be emotional etc etc.

Dad's are expected to wing it. Go to work, be the breadwinners, be practical, sensible anything but emotional. Well, we feel it too. Unfortunately, all those books on motherhood and babyhood are written by women. I suspect its because Dad's don't get the time to write or just can't get down to doing it (peer pressure??). Don't close this window just yet...I'm not about to write a book.

This is what I felt in the weeks leading up to the delivery.

When he kicked for the first time - Mom was elated. I felt joy. Immense joy. Not because he kicked. Because she was elated. At that time, he was still a foetus to me. Something I had studied in medical school. The kicking was something we took for granted because we saw pregnant women all the time. But my wife was glowing....and I felt Joy. Immense Joy.

When she started getting Braxton Hicks Contractions - Mom was elated and confused. She had tons of questions. It started to sink in. This was my child. Something I had helped make! My flesh, my blood, possible looks like me. We talked about the contractions. Explained to her it was normal. It's just your uterus getting ready. I am convinced it is an act of God, not to help the uterus get ready or the mother, but for the Dad to realise he's having a baby.

She gets backaches - She felt tired and hassled. It hurt! I said I know. I had no idea. It's impossible to know what kind of pain someone is in unless you've suffered it before. No matter how much you say you know. It was her uterus getting bigger and ready.

She dropped her mucous plug - I was the doctor that my brain is conditioned to be. "It's ok", I said. It's part of the process. I completely missed the fact that this was the first sign of progressing into labour. Of course, it takes days after this for labour to begin, but I am not a gynaec and I missed it. The dad in me began to stir.
I drove slower, much slower. I watched signals with more concentration than ever before. I chose roads according to her convenience. It should not hurt her back. No chances with traffic snarls and accidents. 

She was lying in pain when I got back - I realised this was labour. Dad had kicked in. Spoke to Grandma. She was our gynaec. She's the quick thinker in the family. Said lets waste no time. We're off to the hospital. I remained calm. Medicine training kicked in involuntarily. Wife asked can you believe we're in labour. I said yes. It didn't register. She stayed at the hospital from then till delivery. I didn't. Mom did. She would decide progress. I wouldn't.

I went home that night and checked my emails. I had one saying June 20 is Father's day. I thought, "What shall we get dad for this one?"

Then it hit me. Smack in the face. By June 20, I too would be a father. My own child. That I had to care for and worry about. I don't usually worry about things. I'm cold like that. But I melted that night. I believed we were in labour. I understood that I was having a son. I knew that I would do anything for him to be born healthy. It kicked in. 

This was the first lesson my son taught me. Better than any book could ever explain! Better than any other parent could tell me what to feel. Better than my wife knowing before I did. My Son! 

Water Baby

 3rd June:

Ahhh this is the life...Fed, slept, pooped, peed, fed again....I love you Mommy!

*Blink Blink*
Who is this frail looking lady grabbing me??? Uhhh Mom do you know this stranger?? *Blushing* Not my nappy....don't remove that. We've only just met. This isn't even our first date!!

*Brrrrr* Its cold....what do you think you're doing? *Splash, splash* Blurrrgggpppgg
Almost drowned there. This is nothing like Momma's lichor used to be. I can't even taste my pee in this. It's so colourless even. How boring.

Hmmm this smooth white bar seems nice. Smells nice too. *Aahhhhh*
That's a better temperature. Wait wait, don't flip me over. I can't swim I can't swim!!
Stop patting my buttocks with the white bar....

Hmmm, this is new. Soft. Nice. Rub behind my ears will you. It's still a little wet there. *Closing Eyes* This is nice. I'll just kick back and relax a bit.

*Sniff Sniff* Wow! I smell great! Must be this new white powder they've doused me with. Aweso.....*Falls Asleep*

Zzzzzzzz

Oops! I made you a daddy!

*Blink Blink*

Hmmm, this uterus is starting to push into me now....I'm getting cramped.

Wonder what the date is?? Hey Mom! Mooooooommm!!! mommyyyyyyy!!! What date is it today?

1st June! Isn't this a little early for you to be imposing your uterus onto me!!

I'm still enjoying the tasty treats your friends made you eat at your baby shower 2 days ago! Stop trying to push me out will you.

*Soothes the uterus down* There there, I'm not leaving you and going just yet. We'll be friends for sometime yet, Me, My umbilical cord and you!

2nd June:

Ouch! Mom stop pushing. *Gags* I'm not getting enough air! Help Help....*Kicks frantically with each contraction* I can't take this anymore...I'm too lazy to fight this *Heart Rate Falls*

Ohhh everything's going dark. I'm feeling numb. Hey, wait a minute! Come back here! You, yes you anterior wall of the uterus....What's the big idea letting so much light in!!! Arrrrgghh, there's a knife in your belly!!!

*Bright Lights* *Blink...Blink...Blink*

Oh Crap! I'm out!!! Better start crying before that scary looking pediatrician whacks my bottoms!! *Waaaah Waaaahh*

Ohhh Mommy you're pretty!!!!! Who is that monstrosity of a man with a cap and mask! That's dad! You have got to be kidding me. How could someone looking like that produce something as cute as me!

Ok ok, smile for the camera!

Gosh, I'm tired now! Enough for the first day of my life.

More later